I'm not gonna lie - it has been rough around here. Jackson has been completely bucking his schedule and it has been making me crazy. The inconsistency of his sleep was doing me in. I was (and am) over it. Thank goodness for friends who were willing to listen to me complain, vent, and whine. It has gotten a tiny bit better, but not tons. I'm hoping that soon we will get into a groove. I looked back over the blog and from my calculations I've been struggling for about a month. I'm ready for him to turn 6 months - I figure it HAS to be better than this fifth month has been. It just HAS to be.
I'm learning through all of this and I post this because I want to be REAL when my kids read this blog. It isn't always art projects and outings. Some days (or weeks or months) are just hard, really hard. But we have to make it through them. I'm learning how to let go of some of my control and just take it as it comes, but that is a big challenge for me. Yet I see how much this kind of stuff can upset me and I do not like it. I want to be more flexible so that is what I am working on; not letting one bad nap ruin my entire day or week or month.
Right now, I'm just tiptoeing around in our house during nap time. I mean - IT IS QUIET. I hope to get back to a normal schedule and have more confidence in his sleep. I truly believe we will get there, but who knows how long it will take.
So that is where we are. We are making our way...one day at a time (okay okay, more like one minute at a time!)
Girl. I so feel ya. I was looking back at my blog about Caleb's sleep too after we talked the other day. I was amazed... it's amazing how crazy this year has been. In January - JANUARY 2012 - this year!! - he fiiiiiinnnaaalllly started sleeping through the night. I don't see how I made it that long. 8 months. The thought of doing it all over again someday makes me a little dizzy. But I totally agree with what you said - I'm so thankful I documented it - and somehow feel it will be a testament to how much we love them when they are old enough to read these things! All the prayers for peaceful sleep I prayed for my sweet baby were answered... in time. And I finally got back to some normal person. The scary hairy monster I'd become was finally nice and neatly tucked back inside. I began to reappear. Motherhood changes you in this way that you're never quite the same. I, too, am still working on flexibility. You can do it!! Keep on keeping on. "This too shall pass." I'm so thankful to have other friends to journey this road with :)
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